Honors is not an easy decision
The school called me this week. They want my son to join the honors math class. His face lit up like a Christmas tree when I shared the news with him. Still, he was confused. He wondered why they would pick him — he’s always struggled with math.
His teacher explained that he may flourish in honors math; it’s taught differently than everyday math he’s had since first grade. Still, she cautions, the homework demands will be strenuous. “We’ll cover one new topic each night; he can’t fall behind one day, as each unit builds on the next.”
I want this so much for him. I want him to be able to walk through the halls and school and think “I’m gifted at math. My teachers think I’m gifted at math.”
Turning up the pressure a bit more, she added, “And, this honors class is actually deemed as a high school class by the state. So, his grade will go on his high school transcript.”
Why is it, I wonder? That our educational system seems to penalize those who have a passion and “gift” by giving them more work with dire consequences? Why do we push our prodigies so hard that we introduce the possibility of burnout at such an early age? The message is clear: if he chooses honors math, he’ll spend more time sitting at a desk.
Wisely, my son turned the offer for honors down. “I don’t think I can handle the extra homework.”
“I just want you to know that while you’re in this lower-level math class, we all know you can make it in the honors class,” I said. “I have no doubt about that. Your wise decision not to join honors is simply about time — not your ability.”
“I know Mom,” he said.
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what a wise boy you have
and i can see where he gets it.
You’re right about the penalization. My friend’s daughter was given the chance to taken Algebra two years early….but now she has to take two MORE years of math at the end of high school. Can’t just give her a pass because she’s done all the required stuff, you see.
Wow, book smart and life smart…what a great combination.
I was in the honors program in school. They seemed to have the homework thing all wrong. If you’re in the program you must be at least a little smarter than the average kid, so why not let you judge for yourself how much “practice” you need to grasp the concept??
I think this is such a wise decision. Years ago my daughter got passed by for the TAG (talented and gifted) program… There just aren’t enough “spaces” and of course they all go to those who are “somebody” here locally. Then later on they tried to get me to move her up a grade. I refused, afraid as you were about the demands being too much. I am so happy with this decision. She is now entering her junior year, has always been happy not to have left her class/friends, and has always been on the honor roll. I think everyone puts way too much pressure/stress on the children anyhow… Good thinking!
There is so much more to child development than intellect! So often we get completely out of balance pushing homework and advancement instead of letting things happen at a good, healthy pace. Sometimes the social component is crucial–I was in gifted/honors classes in grade school, and it didn’t work real well to have my little 3rd grade self with the 6th graders just to do advanced reading. Hopefully your son will keep his pride in his abilities no matter what.