Susiej

Love is a choice, not an act

I’ve taught you have to give a great kiss; how to choose a great bottle of champagne, and how to stay faithful in your relationship — however you define it. Now, it’s time to tell your significant other exactly what it is you do want. Researchers say the biggest cause of dissatisfaction in relationships is that couples rarely talk to each other about what they want. We both just assume the other person knows exactly how we feel.

When I explained how to make a dream come true, number 5 clearly states that one of the keys is to write your dream down to coax it into life. We can’t have all of that frustration brewing, seeping out disrupting our sleep. We have to get what we want.

Most of you said you just couldn’t come up with anything. I think Jani summed it up perfectly: “It’s hard to want something for Valentine’s Day without sounding selfish.” Jani, and to all of you out there, it’s OK, and sometimes necessary, to be clear about what you want… has nothing to do with being selfish.

Apparently, you’re all not alone out there with this shyness and apprehension about Valentine Gifts. I glanced through the WSJ (February 9, 2008; Page W6), and found an entire article lamenting the proper etiquette of the Valentine gift, and how much weight it carries on the future of the relationship. So, before I announce the winner to the Valentine Wishes contest, I thought it might be fun to look at what the WSJ says are the best his and hers Valentine’s Gifts. If you need some ideas on what to buy, or ask for, this list of gifts might help you:

For Him:

Digital Photo Keychain: How cool is that? a four-ounce, Digital Photo Keychain that serves as a James-Bond type brag book of you and the kids. (The WSJ did not rank this first..it was number three, but I thought it was too cool to keep in third place.)

Sinatra. The Frank Sinatra 4CD/1DVD set. That’s a classy gift, and it stays romantic as long as you don’t throw in the WSJ’s recommendation for The Godfather DVD Collection .

Stationery. (I love typing that word, by the way…I love how it ends in “ery” and not “ary” because “ery” has an e like “letter.”) Mrs. John L. Strong has monogrammed note cards you can have stamped in silver with his initial in masculine colors like milkweed and French blue; $95 for 20 cards and envelopes (mrsstrong.com). I think Sam, because she has such an eloquent way with words, would love to have this gift too.

For Her

Fair Trade Roses and white calla lilies. Sam’s Club is offering fair trade Roses this year from Ecuador, with some proceeds reserved for Ecuadorian day-care centers, scholarships, adult-literacy programs and housing funds, while also offering fair wages to their workers. A dozen fair-trade red roses for $64.44, from samsclub.com. Lilies, grown on certified farms in Colombia, in a clear glass vase, $69.99 from 1-800-flowers. Louann spoke eloquently and clearly from her heart, and I could definitely see her loving this gift.

Silk Scarf and Candles. $45 Burmese-silk covered heart-shaped box tied with satin ribbons from redenvelope.com that contains three scented candles instead of candy. Me, I’d rather just have the Chocolate to eat by candlelight. Amy, with the bee and soul post, this could warm your heart.

Romantic Meal at Home… and she doesn’t have to cook… or clean up. The easiest way to do this, is via Amazon.com’s”Romantic Quail Dinner for 2,” sold by Just Caviar, which includes quail and caviar for $187.50. Caviari is supposed to be an aphrodisiac, as are asparagus, oysters, truffles and champagne. My thought, honey, if you’re reading this… Quail? Quail? I don’t like quail… I think. However, I would do anything to get out of cleaning the kitchen. I could see Leslie, who spelled out e-x-a-c-t-l-y what she wants, appreciating this gift.

The challenge was to:

1. Write a post outlining just one little — or a complete list — of things you’d like, or you’d like done for you on valentine’s day this year. This can be in the form of a letter, a poem, or you could even use a picture to say your 1,000 words. Just generate your wish. Guys, you’re included too. This could be a real education for your significant other.
2. Once you’ve written your post, link your post to this post’s perma link.
3. Leave me a comment here with your post title so that I can add you to the random.org drawing on February 9, 2008 at midnight. (Midnight is much more romantic, don’t you think?)

The prizes are:

• A private e-mail from SusieJ sent to your significant other outlining the details of what you’d like.
• $20 gift certificate from Red Envelope.
• A softcover book compilation of each and every entry entered in the contest. You choose the cover by sending me the jpg of the photo you want, and I’ll have the book printed and sent to you.
• Copy of the new book by Nadine Haobsh, Beauty Confidential: The No Preaching, No Lies, Advice-You’ll- Actually-Use Guide to Looking Your Best. Guys, there’s stuff in there for you too.

I’m thanking God right now that I did have the foresight to make this contest random, because I am so thankful I don’t have to pick the best one. So, here goes. www.random.org picked ….. Jani! Congratulations.

Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone…

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Related posts:

1. Contest: Can You Name 13 Diner Food Codes?
2. If I had known it was Her last Birthday, I wouldn’t have sent Her Flowers
3. The Winner and the Answers: 13 Diner Food Code Names
4. Almost didn’t make it
5. Adventure’s Gifts

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