Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder
When it comes to sex, that is… according to the book Sex Detox: Recharge Desire. Revitalize Intimacy. Rejuvenate Your Love Life,
When I mentioned this to my husband, he responded with the obvious, “Didn’t we already do that four times… after the birth of each of our sons?” True, but this is a little different.
Ian Kerner makes a valid argument in Sex Detox to stop and pay attention to where you are, how you got there, and where you’d like to go.
The “replacement” for sex is hours spent instead in solitary contemplation, and the art of mindfulness. Kerner provides a daily agenda of questions to ponder and journal about, starting with that one element that keeps popping up in so many self-help books: your childhood. He asks you to delve into your past and remember what triggered your current perceptions of sex, and how those beliefs are still operating in your life today.
The book is for married couples, as well as singles. If you’re single, Kerner says, the program will lead you to a coupled romance. The Sex Detox program will require a large investment of your time, as the exercises will take up to an hour a day. That said, Kerner does have a step-by-step daily plan to guide you through the end. If you are looking for a way to ignite the fire in your bedroom, heal past hurts and improve your marriage… or your chances of marriage, Sex Detox can help.
During Detox, you will begin the process of reOrdering:
- Observation
- Recognition
- De-Coupling
- Engagement
- Regulating
This will help you to discover,
…Our “love maps” represent the blueprint of our erotic desires, shaped by previous positive and negative sexual experiences and explaining everything from why we gravitate to a particular physical type to what feeds our private fantasies and actual practices.
I’m impressed with Kerner’s candor in revealing the intimate secrets of couples who have worked through many painful issues in their relationships. (Anonymous of course.) Sometimes, when you’re lost, the best thing to do is to stop right where you are and wait.
More reviews are at PBN, and Dr. Kerner himself will appear on the Motherhood Uncensored Podcast 2/20 from 9-9:30pm EST! Get your copy of his new book, Sex Detox.
[...] Parent Bloggers Network. The plan? Thirty days without sex to rev up your sex life. Check it out, Abstinence makes the Heart Grow Fonder. Bookmark to: Hide [...]
Color me “skeptical.” I’ve not read the book…but I much prefer the cliche: “If you don’t use it you lose it.” Life is too short for abstinence! But, if it works for some, then more power to ‘em. A good review, though, girlfriend.
[...] “The “replacement” for sex is hours spent instead in solitary contemplation, and the art of mindf… [...]